How it all began-1998

From chapter 1:

“If Mrs. Ford kicks us out, can we come stay with you?”

“You’re not going to get kicked out. Just make sure you keep doing what you need to do.”

I almost believed myself when I said it. It really could be that simple, right? You do all the “normal” things a kid is supposed to do and in the end, you’ll still have a place to lay your head that night-and if you’re lucky, it will be the same place you laid your head the night before?

“Okay, but if we get kicked out, can we stay at your house?”

A few more volleys of “you won’t get kicked out” and “what if we do” later, I cave.

“Yes, you can come live with me if it doesn’t work out at Mrs. Ford’s.”

What am I supposed to say? No, in fact you can’t come live with me because I am really happy with my life of relative privilege, and it would be a real inconvenience to have you come and stay in my home?

I’ve always lived the life of relative privilege-always known I had a home and that the people who cared about me would keep me safe and give me a place to call my own. As a result, it took me a while to fully appreciate the seriousness of what the kids were asking. Frankly, I think they were so used to being let down that their questions were more the result of compulsion than any real effort to actually secure housing.

Regardless, it wasn’t as if they actually believed me when I said they could stay in my home. It was a mutual unspoken agreement that if we all said what we were supposed to say, then that would be enough for the time being. No strings attached; let’s just tell each other what we need to hear in order to move on to the next topic.